Achieving Your Goals: 5 Days To A More Focused Self

Achieve Your Goals: 5 days to a more focused self

When new year’s rolls around, it is ceremonious to declare resolutions – things you want to make you better in the coming year. It has become a running joke that these resolutions are maintained for at most a few weeks. Jan 1st is a day many fitness centers prepare for because there will be a guaranteed surge of applicants. And the gym will be packed for a few weeks, then re-enter its Zen-like hibernation until the next January 1st.

So, addressing that is step one toward achieving goals. Before you plan to radically change your life for a year, see what you can sustain for a day, a week, and eventually years.

For myself, I have a terrible smoking habit. I smoke nearly on the hour. So whatever I am doing in my life, it makes me think I should have a cigarette every hour of the day. I suspect it is my attention span, the length of my routines and my convolution of relaxation with smoking.

I begin each morning with a nicotine stick. So, a first goal would be, for every morning for a few days, replace the reward of a cigarette with a reward of something that produces the same feeling of relief but is far healthier for me. I enjoy cooking, so whipping up some vegetables to eat is a solution I am trying.

Like most things in life, this is all experimental. There is no one right way to raise a kid, there is no one right way to make money, and there is no one right way to accomplish your goals. But what has been helpful for me and others is to create a routine in which progress toward your accomplishments is natural and second nature. Healthy choices are simply something you do.

The brain responds and rewards progress. It is natural in the modern world to only feel fulfilled by large and outlandish accomplishments. But the daily work is what allows for those spikes to occur – without the daily work, those inevitable flukes of achievement are far less likely to occur.

To paraphrase Jesus, “Look not to the outside (fancy cars and fancy houses) but to the inside (a personality and lifestyle that can sustain such things).

This is key. If you chase the quick fix, you will end up like me – having committed to quitting smoking dozens of times but relapsing harder each time. To unchain yourself from bad habits and equip yourself with good habits, takes daily progress. The work of forming goals, working toward bettering yourself, that is the blacksmith’s work that makes that shiny sword and shield you can use in life. Sweat equity they call it.

So, as promised, here is a guide to 5 days to start achieving your goals in life:

Day 1: Reflection

On day 1, you will be reflecting upon what really matters to you. This exercise primarily involves answering detailed and specific questions about yourself and giving honest answers. There is no grade or social pressure. Just think about what matters to you. Spend most of this day constructing questions on what you want in your life. A list of questions you can ask yourself (I will provide my personal answers as reference) include:

1.       Q: Where do you want to live?

a.         A: I want to live somewhere quiet

2.       Q: Is there anything you dislike about your physical appearance?

a.       A: I get adult acne

3.       Q: Is there anything you dislike about your physical health?

a.       A: I am physically too large to fit into standard chairs and spaces

4.       Q: Do you want to travel? Where? For how long?

a.       I want to travel for work, with enough time to learn about the locations and their people.

5.       Q: What do you want people to pay you for?

a.       A: I want to get paid for sharing knowledge that is useful to people

6.       Q: What do you think you are good at?

a.       A: I explain “math things” very well

7.       Q: What do others say you are good at?

a.       A: writing

8.       Q: How good are your persuasion and sales skills?

a.       A: Not good at all

9.       Q: What do you spend your money on every week. Make a spreadsheet.

a.       A:

Item     Cost
Food     50
Educational material   100
Charity    100

10.   Q: What two things about your above answers you would ideally like to change in the next 90 days

a.       A: I would like to stop being so big

b.       A: I would like to travel for work

Day 2: Research

Doomsday preppers have been denied. Zoom and Uber eats has saved us all.

Kidding aside, the world has been changing greatly over the last two decades. Jobs are not necessarily found through the traditional path. This makes inventive and experimental research more valuable than ever.

The conventional answers no longer work for many. Degrees don’t even guarantee job interviews. A job today is no guarantee of a job tomorrow. What is the solution to all this uncertainty.

Myself, I have been educating myself through books and interviews. I can name some authors: Douglas Krugar is one. Another is Cal Newport. These and many other authors preach that it is essential that every person have two skills these days, no matter what they choose to do:

1.       A strong competency in some form of payable skill or work

2.       Persuasion skills

Beyond this, the ability to find paying work all depends on your efforts and the available opportunity. Examples include:

1.        You will need to learn to persuade on paper to get an interview for a job (most jobs require online applications these days)

2.       You will need to learn to persuade the hiring manager you are best for the position.

3.       You will need to negotiate salary.

4.       Obviously, you will need to do your job well.

5.       But not only well, but extremely well. What this means is, try to find a way to be so good at something people remark and compliment you for your efforts.  You don’t need to be tiger woods, but if you are starting as a waiter and aren’t getting good tips, you might be the problem.

6.       Learn to position yourself so you increase your value to the marketplace. For example, if you can handle waitering very well, there are some higher-end places that give a very livable wage to their restaurant staff.

7.       Always be learning, always be experimenting.

And any of these examples could change on the fly. Things like COVID happen all the time now. So be nimble and be smart and many opportunities can open for you.

Day 3: Start your plan.

To selfishly focus on my plans, I want to lose enough weight that I am “normal size”. This has a clear metric – fit into size 28 pants. I am far from this (size 42 currently), so I need to make continual but effortful progress. Here is an example of the type of plan I intend to use.

1.       Eat vegetable meals more often (without the accompanying caloric oils and dressings)

2.       Exercise daily

3.       Find a compensating activity for emotional eating or boredom eating

Day 4: Evaluate, Improve, and Experiment

I am replacing my smoking habit with a doodling journal. When I get tired or stressed or need to think, I will doodle for no reason other to have a physical activity to do. I found out this works through experimentation. I first evaluated why I smoke? Boredom or need to think. Then I found a similar physical activity that will assist me in the same ways smoking assisted me.

And now I work on my beginner level drawing. Though that’s not the point it is an added benefit

Day 5: Recalibrate.

I will be iterating over and refining these steps several times as I pursue and achieve my goals. I hope you will do likewise and chase the gold medal in your life.

Sincerely,

Vin