You're An Olympic Level Procrastinator If You Do These Things
Have you ever encountered big projects in your work or school career that just seem to get away from you? Do you keep telling yourself you're going to complete it but find other activities to do instead? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may be a procrastinator.
If the following narration applies to you, you’re definitely a procrastinator and that's stopping your growth.
1. You struggle with a lack of concentration
You open your computer to Word Documents, racking your brain for a good place to begin writing. The stark white screen seems to be taunting you with its emptiness. A ping sounds and you click the notification, getting distracted by the cute video of a dog sleeping that was shared on Facebook.
You think to yourself, my dog is way cuter, but you share it on your page anyways. Two hours later and you're scrolling through a random argument between two strangers, surprisingly invested in the outcome.
I've done this on a number of occasions. Sometimes my mom would hold my phone and I'd have to turn my computer on Do Not Disturb. Arguments between strangers can just be so fascinating though!
2. The YouTube rabbit hole works way too easily on you
You click on a YouTube link someone posted about an intriguing conspiracy theory within Disney movies, and before you realize it, you have clicked on three more related videos and fell down the rabbit hole. Why are you here again? That’s right, you’re supposed to be writing, not clicking on the video for an SNL skit about makeup for men.
Although now that you think about it, your brother has been asking you for makeup tips lately. You shrug, sending him the link and chuckling when he texts back a gif pretending to be mock surprised.
This happens to me every time I go on YouTube. Even if I just need an instructional video, I get distracted.
3. You would rather do something you hate than your project
Sighing, you close YouTube and Facebook. You glance at the clock, seeing that five hours have passed and still not a single word has been typed for your project. The cursor blinks aggressively at you, and you look away from your screen, noticing how messy your room is.
Getting up, you begin to pick up the floor, throwing away your many empty water bottles beside the bed and grabbing the crumpled chip bags from your desk.
You pick up your dog’s toys, tossing them in her bin. She’s napping on the bed, what an easy life dogs have. All they ever do is eat, sleep, and play; no stressful work shifts or intense teachers or overbearing parents.
You wish you could be a dog, but you aren’t, you’re a human with human responsibilities. While contemplating life as a dog, you begin to gather the laundry and maybe even vacuum. By the time you are done another hour has passed.
Who hasn't cleaned while they procrastinate? I had a friend in high school who used cleaning as her go-to excuse to not complete her homework. We would always discuss how well it staves off our parent's anger. They just aren't sure whether to be annoyed you haven't finished your work or pleased you cleaned your room.
4. Online Shopping is completely justified
Sitting back down, you once again stare at your blank Word Document before deciding a quick look at Amazon's latest deals surely won't hurt. In the Trending Deals section, you find an adorable leather mini backpack that would pair perfectly with your new yellow sundress. Pulling an outfit together in your mind, you also search for a pair of new sandals and some jewelry to tie it all together.
Amazon has some truly amazing deals, and you feel bad giving Jeff more money, but you can’t help the convenience of it. Besides, the stuff can sometimes literally be at your doorstep the next day!
It takes away the social anxiety aspect of shopping, while still giving you a shot of dopamine. You click "Add To Cart" and a smile is drawn to your face. It quickly fades, however, as you see a text from your friend asking what you decided to write about for the project.
Personally, I think Amazon is my weakness. The convenience is especially dangerous now that items can be delivered on the same day. Something about buying whatever I need from the comfort of my home is so appealing.
5. Suddenly talking to your friend has a new level of importance
Not that it wasn't important before, but now it just became the most fascinating subject on the planet. You quickly change the topic of the conversation, focusing on the newest guy your friend has been talking to.
She goes on a mini-rant about how frustrating it is that men can't express their feelings, making it harder for her to get closer to him. You shoot back the customary Yeahs and OMGs, thinking about your own crush all the while.
When your friend is done with her rant, you crack a joke about the guy, and she “lols” in response. She asks how your crush has been doing, and you launch into a story about how the other night, he FINALLY opened up to you. You talk about how it feels good to be trusted like that, and how you hope he continues to be honest and open in the future.
I'm pretty sure my friends and I spend 75% of our time talking about guys. If we were characters in a book, we definitely would not be passing the Bechdel Test.
6. Naps never felt so good
Suddenly your eyes feel heavy, so you end the conversation and shut your laptop, snuggling under your cozy comforter. It's probably the worst possible time for a nap, but the bed never felt as comfortable and inviting as it does now.
You think about the last time you took a nap, but you honestly can’t remember. It’s not that it was a long time ago, it’s just that you’ve been so busy the days all seem to run together.
You want to fight the urge to close your eyes, but you can't find a good enough reason to not go to sleep right now. Your dog is still snoring softly, and you decide you may as well join her in dreamland. Thoughts of the looming deadline fade to the back of your mind as you let your thoughts drift off into dreams.
Does anyone else take naps at the worst possible times? I feel like every time I want to take a nap, something needs urgently done. It's like my body has trained itself to feel sleepy when pressure is applied to my schedule.
7. You get cravings you must satisfy
Waking up, you realize it's way past dinner time, and your stomach growls in frustration. You sit up slowly, sighing as you notice it's dark outside now. You're too lazy to cook, but you have a distinct craving for pizza. So you order your usual Ranchero Chicken, ignoring the nagging thoughts that this will be your fifth cheat day in a row.
You feel super crappy about procrastinating, but rather than confront your bad habits, you choose to eat your feelings. The pizza really hits the spot, and you use the gooey deliciousness to justify the strain it put on your wallet. You just accept that you are a procrastinating, pizza-loving friend, and enjoy your late-night meal.
Besides Amazon, DoorDash has got to be in a close second for my weaknesses. Having food delivered to my doorstep is extremely dangerous for my wallet, seeing as I love food but don't really like going out to get it. Who cares if it's not piping hot when it arrives, at least I didn't have to change out of my pajamas.
8. Two hours before the due date, you cram like never before
A constant companion to procrastinating is the late night/early morning cramming. You chug two cups of coffee (or an energy drink) before gluing yourself to your chair and forcing yourself to be done with it. The work may not be the highest quality you've turned in, but at least you were able to hand something in.
I remember the times in high school where I would stay up extra late to finish papers I never started. Now that I think about it, however, I still do that with my college classes. The procrastination cramming has just switched from late nights to early mornings. I'm not sure why I keep doing this to myself, seeing as it only makes me suffer, and yet, I can't help it.
9. You give yourself a post-hand-in pep talk
After submitting your shoddily done assignment, you give yourself a little pep talk about how something is better than nothing, and you will make it up with some sort of extra credit later on. You know you're just lying to yourself because you're totally going to procrastinate on that too, but you don't care. You're just happy to be over with it.
I give myself this pep talk every time I hand in something I waited to do until the last minute. Maybe someday I'll stop being a procrastinator, but that day is not today.
Opinions and Perspectives
I wish the article included some real solutions instead of just calling us out like this!
My favorite part is doing everything except the one thing we actually need to do. It's like productive procrastination.
This article is like a mirror to my soul and I'm not sure how to feel about that.
The Amazon shopping part is dangerous knowledge. Now I know I'm not alone, I feel less guilty about it.
Just realized I'm procrastinating by commenting on an article about procrastination. How meta is that?
Love how the article captures the spiral from one distraction to another. It's like a procrastination domino effect.
We should start a support group for professional procrastinators. We can meet tomorrow... or next week... or whenever.
The part about the blank Word document staring back at you is too real. It's like it's judging me.
I think schools should teach time management skills early on. Might help prevent some of these habits from forming.
It's fascinating how creative we get with alternative activities when we're avoiding something important.
Sometimes I procrastinate by reading articles about how to stop procrastinating. The irony is not lost on me.
I relate to everything except the nap part. I can never nap when procrastinating because anxiety keeps me awake.
The worst is when you procrastinate sleep by scrolling through your phone, knowing you'll regret it in the morning.
You iron your socks? Now that's Olympic level procrastination right there!
That point about doing things you hate instead of the actual work is spot on. I literally ironed my socks yesterday to avoid writing a report.
I've started treating deadlines like they're actually due a day earlier. Sometimes it works... sometimes I still wait until the real last minute.
The article missed mentioning how we reorganize our entire digital files while procrastinating. Anyone else?
My problem is I work better under pressure, so I deliberately procrastinate sometimes. Probably not healthy though.
I feel called out by every single point in this article. Especially the part about late-night cramming.
Does anyone else clean their entire house but leave that ONE thing they actually need to do until the last minute?
This article perfectly captures how one distraction leads to another in an endless cycle.
I started setting my clocks ahead by 15 minutes to trick myself. Somehow I still end up procrastinating those 15 minutes away too.
The friend conversation part is so true. Suddenly every chat becomes the most important thing in the world.
That's just justifying bad habits. We need to learn better time management skills.
Maybe procrastination is just our brain's way of telling us we need a break?
I think we need to stop beating ourselves up about procrastination sometimes. We're all doing our best.
The part about YouTube is so accurate. I went to look up a quick tutorial and ended up watching conspiracy theories about Disney movies for hours.
Is anyone else reading this entire article instead of doing their actual work? Just me?
The DoorDash part hit hard. I've spent so much money on delivery just because I didn't want to cook during study sessions.
That's good to hear about post-college improvement. I'm still in school and wondering if I'll ever break these habits.
I actually got better at managing my time after college. The real world doesn't always allow for last-minute cramming.
You all need to try website blockers. They've helped me stay focused when I absolutely need to get work done.
Well, are hot dogs sandwiches? Now I need to know the conclusion of that debate!
The bit about falling into random Facebook arguments is so real. I once spent two hours following a debate about whether hot dogs are sandwiches.
Looking at online shopping right now while reading this... I feel seen and I don't like it.
The nap part speaks to my soul. Why does my bed feel like a cloud only when I have urgent work to do?
I've actually managed to overcome a lot of my procrastination by using the Pomodoro technique. 25 minutes of work followed by 5 minutes of break really helps.
That bit about cleaning being the go-to excuse is brilliant. Parents can't be mad if you're being productive in some way, right?
True, but our parents had other ways to procrastinate. My mom told me she used to rearrange her entire room instead of studying.
I find it interesting that the article doesn't mention how technology has made procrastination so much easier. Our parents didn't have these many distractions.
The post-hand-in pep talk part made me laugh because I literally just did this yesterday. We never learn, do we?
I actually disagree with this article's negative tone about procrastination. Sometimes we need that time to process and think about our work subconsciously.
The Amazon shopping part is way too accurate. I've bought things I don't even need just to avoid working on important stuff.
My room is immaculate right now because I have a presentation tomorrow that I haven't started yet. At least my procrastination is productive sometimes?
In response to the coffee and panic comment above - that's actually a myth! Last-minute work is usually lower quality, we just think it's better because of the relief of finishing.
Let's be real though, sometimes procrastination pressure creates the best work. I wrote my best essays at 2 AM with coffee and panic as my fuel.
The part about taking naps at the worst times is so true. My body has a sixth sense for when I need to be productive and immediately wants to sleep.
Anyone else find it ironic that I'm reading this article while procrastinating on my work?
The cleaning one hits too close to home. My apartment is never cleaner than when I have a big deadline coming up.
I feel personally attacked by this article, especially the YouTube rabbit hole part. Just yesterday I went from watching a cooking tutorial to learning about ancient Egyptian burial practices at 3 AM.