Here's Why Being Single On Valentine's Day Shouldn't Bother You!
At first glance, this might seem like a heated rant by a bitterly single girl on Valentine's Day. But it's not about the state of being single. It's about why you are single. And I am single because I've been greatly disappointed in all the relationships I've been in. This is indeed a rant. But by a girl who has always found knowledge more empowering than people.
So here is why being single on 14 February or even Valentine's Day itself is not that big of a deal.
1. The shady origins of Valentine's Day
Despite being named after a Christian saint (his story ahead), Valentine's Day actually finds its roots in Roman mythology. Depending on your religious inclinations, that might make the day suspicious or perhaps more exciting for you. Like modern youth, the Romans also celebrated the month of love in a series of events spanning across days.
14 February was to appease the goddess Juno Fructifer. In one ritual, women submitted their names to be chosen by men in a lucky draw. Not very couple-friendly, if you ask me. 15 February was Lupercalia, the festival to honor Faunus, the god of fertility. In typical ways of our ancient ancestors, the 'celebration' involved sacrifices of animals and even humans. Doesn't make Valentine's Day sound like a day worth celebrating, right?
2. The sad story of St. Valentine
When it comes to fulfilled happy love, St. Valentine really just cuts a sorry figure. Not something any couple or lover would want to look forward to. According to legend, Valentine was a priest who served Rome in the late third century. Around this time, Emperor Claudius II decided that single men were better soldiers than married ones (because the latter have hope for the future and low-key hate war, you know?). So he ruled that marriages should be banned for young men (such patriarchy, much wow). Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree continued to perform marriages for young couples in love in secret. When Claudius discovered this, Valentine was beheaded brutally.
Another version of the story is just as miserable. Another saint of the same name was jailed by a similar tyrant. He fell in love with the jailor's daughter. His last letter to her before the execution was poignantly signed 'From your Valentine'. And that's where the term comes from.
two minutes of silence
And you are sitting there crying about not having a date! There are worse problems in the world Karen!
3. Valentine's Day is a corporate scam!
Unless you are living in a fairy tale, this should have been pretty clear. If you are in a relationship, they will guilt you into buying all these flowers and chocolates and teddy bears lest you are proven to be a bad partner. And if you are single, they will show you all these beautiful pictures of couples going abroad to force you to spend exorbitant amounts to pamper yourself. Well, self-care is important, but so are wise expenditure habits.
In 2020, Americans alone spent $27.4 billion on Valentine's Day merchandise! That is one-third of Mark Zuckerberg's net worth! Just don't blame him tomorrow for being the owner of a giant exploitative capitalist corporation if you let your money flow senselessly today!
4. Love is, after all, a chemical reaction.
Little oxytocin, no love. More oxytocin, aaaahhhh the adrenaline rush!
Love is just a combination of three human mechanisms - libido, partner preference, and attachment. So you fall in love for three reasons. Either because you're horny (the most understandable, to be honest). Or because you desperately want to be a mommy or daddy. Or because you have unresolved mommy or daddy issues from childhood. For the second, get a pet! For the third, read some Freud dude! And for the first, well, I don't know. Probably that is a valid reason for crying about being single.
In any case, have a date with your mind this Valentine's Day. While all these blogs and internet influencers tell you how to immerse in the best way possible in the market of love, take a step back and look at it objectively. Probably introspect on why none of your relationships work out. Or perhaps think about the entire drama of the big day and have a laugh with yourself. Either way, you discover who your best mate truly is. That one person whose companionship you offer in every relationship. That one person who you live with every single second of your life - Valentine's Day or not. You.
Opinions and Perspectives
The historical background of Valentine's Day is actually quite dark and disturbing. I had no idea about the human sacrifices part!
I love how this article challenges the whole commercialized nature of Valentine's Day. It's refreshing to see someone point out how we're basically being manipulated into spending money.
The scientific breakdown of love into chemical reactions makes so much sense. I've always wondered why my feelings seem to follow such predictable patterns.
Honestly, I disagree with reducing love to just chemistry. There's something magical about human connection that science can't fully explain.
The story about St. Valentine secretly performing marriages is actually pretty romantic when you think about it. He died standing up for love!
Can we talk about that $27.4 billion spending figure? That's absolutely insane. We really need to rethink our priorities as a society.
What really struck me was the part about Roman traditions. A lucky draw to choose partners? Imagine if we still did that today!
I actually find it liberating to think of love as a chemical reaction. Takes away all the pressure of finding the perfect match.
The article makes some good points, but I think it's a bit too cynical. There's nothing wrong with celebrating love, even if the holiday has commercial aspects.
That comparison to Mark Zuckerberg's net worth really put things in perspective for me. We're literally spending billions on cards and chocolates.
I completely agree about getting a pet instead of rushing into relationships. My dog gives me all the oxytocin I need!
The part about self-discovery is spot on. I've learned more about myself during my single periods than in any relationship.
While I get the historical criticism, I think we can create our own meaning for Valentine's Day. It doesn't have to be about its origins.
The article makes me feel better about being single. It's nice to know there are others who see through the Valentine's Day hype.
I never knew about Emperor Claudius II banning marriages for young men. Talk about government overreach!
That bit about Freud made me laugh. Maybe I should read some psychology books instead of downloading dating apps.
The idea of having a date with your mind is actually pretty profound. We often forget to nurture our relationship with ourselves.
Anyone else find it interesting how the Romans celebrated love for multiple days? Maybe we should bring that tradition back!
You lost me at love being just a chemical reaction. My feelings for my partner are way more complex than that.
I appreciate how the article balances humor with serious historical and scientific facts. Makes the message more digestible.